Five Wrong Ways to Borrow A Drunken Reader’s Books

  1. Argue ardently against any book suggestion the Drunken Reader makes to you. Bonus points if you are loud and wrong while insulting their intelligence.image07
  2. Mistreat their beloved books by tearing the pages and snapping the spine. Books were made to be used right? Besides, it’s just a book. What’s to get so upset about.image10
  3. Speaking of mistreatment, absolutely dog ear the pages and use the book as a coaster. Drunken Readers LOVE dried moisture rings on their favorite novels. Trust me. You’ll be doing them a favor.image02
  4. Sharing is caring. Be sure to pass your borrowed books to as many friends and strangers as you can. It’s not like borrowing books is some kind of enforceable contract. And it’s definitely not like Drunken Readers ever resort to violence. Often. image04
  5. Don’t get too upset if you lose a Drunken Reader’s book. It’s not like losing a book is some kind of capital crime or anything. And no, replacing the book isn’t ever necessary. Ever.

Books are just books. Or maybe I’m just drunk. Meh.


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